I seems to lacks nothing physically, but I have lost everything deep within. Be it faith, hopes, beliefs…etc. I may not be the most pitiful person in the world, it’s just that I am really tired…tired of this world. So I might be the best person to unveil this curiosity doubt of mine. I am not negative, and honestly I am not in a despair condition while deciding on doing this. =)
Why I lived:
- cause if I don’t, I will sin by causing my parents to be sad
- cause I was given the responsibility of taking care of someone who brought me into this world
- life was given to me and it’s a sin to destroy this gift
- attempting unnatural death is a sinful thought
It have comes to a point where I feel that I shall have a try on something meaningful, regardless of the outcome.
Years ago, I’ve made a vow…whether it really happens or not~ I have no regrets.
And now…I shall know if the vow really exists~
I shall use make another exchange…this time with everything I have received as the gift of god~ I just sees that if the outcome is positive, it would be beneficial to others and if the outcome is negative I would have lost nothing…
We shall see…
Gabriel ~
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